Category Archives: Reflections

Miley Moment

Another Tokyo represent moment!!! This is what I wore to meet up with Lookbook icon Benjamin Galbraith and his friend Zach who has the most diverse and eclectic music choices. Thank you to my dearest fashion brother Kiko for introducing me to these guys who successfully accomplished the almost impossible task of making me love tailored suits. Not that I’m having a style metanoia again but at least I know now where to buy and what to do when I need to be more prim and proper. I also got to know the very cute Izumi who’s young, energetic, stylish and kind-hearted enough to take these shots and capture my Miley Cyrus fashion moment (minus the foam finger). This is one of the best things that blogging brought me- meeting different kinds of people and making new friends who help me widen my horizons.

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My blogging sister Ashley once said that fashion blogs are boring and getting emptier. I believe it’s true especially when bloggers become more commercial and less personal. Some are just all about the perks, the free stuff, the glamour, the events and runway show invites, the snaps for magazines etc. I admit I was like that in the younger years of my blog but then, time and experience helped me go back to the basics and the core reason why I started blogging- to share a part of myself. When I was in high school, my computer teacher defined blogs to be simply online diaries. That got stuck in my head. Blogs should be more personal like a diary. Something that will take readers to the soul of the blogger and will help them to know more about that person. Bloggers should be able to share their thoughts and emotions in the most heartfelt way and touch the readers and get them engaged.

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SPINNS Harajuku Tokyo tee and pendant, H&M shirt and pants, Zara shoes, Michael Kors watch and OS Accessories Walrus cap

Moreover, as much as I love my readers who continue to support me for more than three years, I mainly blog for myself. I do this to have a venue where I can hone my capabilities- writing, story-telling, photography and all those stuff. If my readers love what I do or what I wear, I truly appreciate the appreciation. I don’t have any other reasons like to become a style icon and ask people to copy what I wear. I actually hate it when people copy others (bloggers or celebrities) that’s why I am a strong proponent of finding one’s own style and striving hard to be unique and creative. But I also respect it whenever others tell me how horrible or trashy I look. It’s their prerogative to have their own opinions but I am only born to do what I need to do. I was never born to be a pleaser. There’s only one person I have to please and that’s myself. So it’s either you hate me or you love me. If you hate me, then you can just go to a place where my face, my style and my blog won’t bother you. If you love me, then you are more welcome to stalk me and read my blog anytime you want. In the words of RuPaul, “No T, No Shade”. No disrespect but it is what it is.

*chu*

Photos by Izumi Nagai and post-processing by Rexcy Domingo

 

Realizations With Remi

I was so happy to see my friend Remi again before I left for my Kansai trip. I met him two years ago here in Tokyo when he was still a Japanese language student. We hanged out a few times until he left for New York to pursue law. After finishing his summer internship last July, he decided to visit Japan with some of his friends. Lucky that he gave me some of his precious time for he was busy showing his friends around the city and he was also scheduled to leave for a trip to Kansai and Kyushu area.

The catch up session I had with Remi gave me some realizations which I think will take with me for the rest of my life.

* I’ve always felt that I’m STUCK here in Tokyo but at least, I am stuck in a very beautiful city that can offer me lots of opportunities.

* If a person made a strong positive impact on you, you will know and remember every single important detail of that time you’ve spent together. The things he loves and hates, the way he acts and thinks, etc.

* Some people can just get away with the past with the forgive-and-forget method. They need enough time and space calm their nerves down and move on with their lives until they’ve almost forgotten about that situation. However…

* …there are also some people who needs official closure. They are the ones who settle unfinished businesses of the past by sitting down, talking about it and finally putting a conclusion to everything that had happened. They believe that closures put an end to all the misery and useless hoping.

Just saying!

*chu*

Will You Be My Friend?

There are so many reasons why you never should:
I’m sometimes sullen, often shy, acutely sensitive,
My fear erupts as anger, I find it hard to give,
I talk about myself when I’m afraid
And often spend the day without anything to say

Often I’m too serious, seldom predictable the same,
Sometimes cold and distant, probably I’ll always change.
I bluster and brag, seek attention like a child.
I broud and pout, my anger can be wild.

I had a small misunderstanding with a friend from the Philippines over some petty issue. I admit, it was my fault due to my occasional (you can also say usual) tactlessness. In my pursuit to be a more matured person, I approached him, said sorry and explained myself why it all happened. I knew it’s one of the most sincerest apologies that I have ever done because I wouldn’t bother doing it if I wasn’t guilty…or if the person doesn’t matter in all aspects. After all, we’ve been friends since we were 10 and I thought that was reasonable enough for him to accept my sorry and brush everything off from our shoulders. But then, he chose to be devoured by his anger and wouldn’t talk to me until this moment that I’m typing this entry.

I’m the kind of person who’s hard to deal with. Loud, temperamental, vain, tactless, a bully (sometimes but not all the time)- put all of those together and you find yourself a big ball of trouble which is me. I say nasty things and harsh words (intentionally and unintentionally) most of the time. I do things that don’t approve the standards of others. There are times when I mistreat people and make them feel very low. Often times, I get myself into trouble with everything that I mentioned. But, truth be told, it’s never my intention to hurt anyone or make anyone feel bad about themselves. I’m not the type who seeks joy in the grief and pain of others. I guess I’m just being human, imperfect in nature, flawed in more ways than one.

Will you be my friend?
A friend
Who far beyond the feebleness of any vow or tie
Will touch the secret place where I am really I,
To know the pain of lips that plead and eyes that weep,
Who will not run away when you find me in the street
Alone and lying mangled by my quota of defeats
But will stop and stay – to tell me of another day
When I was beautiful.

A friend
Who, when I fear your closeness, feels me push away
And stubbornly will stay to share what’s left on such a day
Who, when no one knows my name or calls me on the phone,
When there’s no concern for me – what I have or haven’t done -
And those I’ve helped and counted on have,
oh so deftly, run.
Who, when there’s nothing left but me,
Stripped of charm and subtlety,
Will nonetheless remain.

That’s why adore people who get along with me and my crazy antics. It takes a lot of understanding to get my jokes. It needs more hanging out with me to read between the lines of my stinging words. Maximum doses of patience are required to stand my vanity. And it takes a lot of strength and love to accept me 100% all natural with no added flavors. I wanna say thank you to those people who didn’t give up on me even if their first impressions were as bad as hell. I know that they are the ones who got far worse than any others but chose to scream with me in the roller coaster ride of my friendship. Thank you to the people who chose to embrace my imperfection to fully enjoy what I can offer as a person.

But I will make you laugh
And love you quite a bit
And hold you when you’re sad.

Though flawed, I believe that I can be a good friend, especially to those who are good to me. I am very vocal about my feelings to my friends. I tell them how much I care and how much they mean to me even if I usually pick on them. I feel good to make them laugh and smile whenever they are with me, giving them a good time while being in my company. I’m very protective of my friends too. I usually stand in front of the line whenever they fight their battles. I don’t like leaving them behind especially in times when they need me the most. As much as possible I want to make them feel that I’ll never forsake them no matter what.

And to all those people who never seem to get the way I am, I fully understand you. It’s hard to comprehend someone like me and I don’t blame you if you choose to drift away from me. I know my imperfections have hurt and disappointed a number of people but I’m always  grateful to those who saw the better side of me. If you think you are one, let me give you a hug and whisper to your ear a heartwarming “thank you”.

Will you be my friend?
For no reason that I know
Except I want you so.

*chu*

PS: Poem by James Kavanaugh. The words are altered in a way that will complement the thoughts of this entry. To appreciate the poem in its original form, click HERE.